Emily says "Make me Bachelorette!"

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 18 July 2011

Emily, the woman who accepted Bachelor Brad's on-air proposal only to dump him a few weeks later, wants to be the star of the next installment of The Bachelorette, where she gets to do the choosing.

Personally, I want her and all her ilk to be shipped to Monster Island where they can be chased and hopefully eaten by giant beasts from Japanese movies.

Sadly, her wish is much more likely to be granted than mine is.

Damn You Skinny (or Fat) Alert™:Best and worst winter beach bodies for early July 2011.

Publication: Star
Date: 11 July 2011

Fresh trash tomorrow! Last trash of the week... right now!

Star has yet another grab bag of women in swimsuits on the cover, some looking good, some not so good. Ignoring the "guess who?" pictures, here's the list.

They found a flattering picture of Kim Kardashian in a bikini. This is not that difficult.

They welcomed Christina Hendricks to gossip hell with a swimsuit picture that makes the Mad Men star look not only top heavy (d'uh!) but heavy as well.

Others in swimsuits include Ke$ha, Coco and Cameron Diaz.

They speculate on enboobenings on ex-Spice Girl Geri Haliwell and Vienna Girardi from The Bachelor.